Kids Say the Darndest Things

If I haven't mentioned it before I am a compensatory education, supplemental instruction, and ESL teacher. Basically the commission that I work for sends me out to private schools in the area and provides these services to the students of that school with special needs. One of my autistic students just left my classroom but before doing so he informed me that his teacher has very smelly breathe and that he likes me better because I don't. Score one for Listerine breathe strips! Obviously social skills are one of the areas that we work on with this student but I'm sure even the thickest skinned parent has had their child(ren) say something that has made them wanted to crawl into the deepest hole they could find. My sweet little angel Madison has recently become one of these children. Justin and I always praise her for being so observant but here are just a few of the times that we secretly wished for a child who was oblivious to her surroundings.

1. Several months ago while in Dunkin' Donuts on a Sunday morning a very rotund man comes walking in an Madison in her very loud, proud to be a big, smart girl voice says "Mommy, Daddy that man is BIG!". We explain that yes he is large but we don't need to tell everyone and her response again very loudly is "But he is really, really BIG!"
2. Last month at my ob. appointment I was making my next appointment with a rather deep voiced woman. Right then and there Madison decides to tell me "Mommy, that lady is a man!" I told her no honey it is a lady and explain to the receptionist that she gets men and woman confused but Madison response it "She sounds like my Daddy and Uncle Corey!"
3. This one thank goodness is not nearly as embarrasing because we were at home among family. I had just finished making a comfort food dinner (mashed potatoes and gravy with Swiss Steak). My husband dished it up in a less than appetizing manner and Madison announced "I can't eat that it looks like poop!".

I'm sure this is just the beginning of more embarrasing times to come. Please share some of the things that your children or children you know have said that have made you want to run for the hills!